Honey, I hate to put a damper on things, but if you guys are just considering poly as an option, and you are already feeling this way… and he is already (seemingly) keeping stuff from you… and your best coping mechanism is to cut off communication?

You know where I’m going with this. Be aware of how challenging just casual swinging can be, and then multiply that for polyamory. The cure for communication problems is more communication, not less.

Just tell him you have noticed the increase in texting, whatever, and you are waiting for him to tell you what is going on. No demands, just take the cover of intrigue away from him, and let him know he ain’t quite as slick as he thinks, so he has to come out with it, and sooner is better than later.