Gear › Forums › Bondage & Rope Art › Are there differences applying rope bondage to men compared to women? › Reply To: Are there differences applying rope bondage to men compared to women?
This is a personal pet topic for me. I am fed up hearing that there’s no difference apart from the shape of the body or where the fatty bits are.
It’s much more than just that!
WARNING: I am not a fan of gender stereotypes. I am equally averse to trying to make everything I type totally politically correct and inclusive beyond the point of reasonable effort! The remainder of this post will be generalisations that I have found through tying masculine bodies of all genders as compared to the feminine ones. I use the term “men” to mean anyone self identifying as masculine or a man
The men I have tied have a different mindset in what they want to get out of their rope bondage experience. Whilst many women fell this way also, most men I have encountered need to feel strongly bound, captured, unable to escape with the fact that they are strong is emphasised and deliberately countered. They are less about decorative ties that flatter their physique and more about the functionality of the tie being solid and inescapable. Unless the man is particularly submissive and likes being told to stand still I have found that most want to be physically directed or “made” to assume certain positions. The men I’ve tied have been less extrovert and less exhibitionist and so the majority of them I have ended up tying with in small settings rather than big clubs. I rarely photograph the men I tie at their request.
It is always worth remembering that it is often much less socially acceptable for a man to appear publicly in bondage compared to a woman. Even within the kink scene there’s a misconception that all men who are sub like to be humiliated or made to look weak. Quite a few I know love the fact that their bondage makes them appear stronger and more masculine. Quite often masculine rope bottoms are not submissive (also true of a lot of feminine ones too). BUT if you find yourself with a masculine submissive who craves objectification and humiliation you’re going to have to take that into account.
Chest ties. Giving a masculine type “moobs” is not going to win you any prizes. Decorative chest ties look great on feminine bodies. Sticking with clean lines emphasises the masculine one. Muscular men are going to have issues with flexibility as the trade off for bigger muscle bulk is less range of motion. Getting to know chest ties with arms in front of the body will be essential for working with larger framed men.
Hips. Lovely wide hips on feminine body make hip harnesses dead easy. Much more care is needed on a masculine body as the hip to waist ratio can be wildly different and the “loose” hip rope that works for a woman could just slip and fail on a man. Women get a bit more padding on the hips from mother nature too, so some guys just won’t be able to tolerate a hip harness at all.
Weight is a factor. That is not the same as saying men are too heavy to be tied.It just means that you’ll have to consider if given your man’s body shape and weight is it safe for you to do partial or full suspension? Can you manage their weight in an accidental fall or slip? How are you going to make it safer? I happily tie with someone almost 1.5 times my bodyweight and have suspended him, but I have to approach it with a different view of the physics than I do for my 0.6 times my bodyweight female bunny.