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Youds1949Participant
If you have an Njoy, which toy(s) do you own, and why do you love them?
DooloverityParticipantMy husband suffers chronic pain and depression and isn’t interested in sex at all anymore, and his only rule for me playing with others is not to do anything that would piss me off if he did it. Right now, I have very little emotional support from him, so I am very jealous of any of that kind of attention he may have to give. This makes my rule that I can play casually but nothing more, which in general I’m okay with.
I had gotten back in touch with old friend who I really click with, and for the past month, we’ve been talking online for hours every day about our mutual interests, one of which is sex, so it usually gets outrageously hot and descriptively interactive. It is a gift beyond even being wanted, to be able to tell someone you want them without fear or embarrassment. Now I’m thinking about him all the time I’m not actually chatting with him, and constantly being focused on saying just the right thing to turn him on even more. How do I do that and not get emotionally involved? How do I keep it casual?
We live pretty far apart, and had plans to meet in about a month and put all this heat into action, but then he tells me that another lady he sees occasionally is having a really rough divorce and has asked him not to have sex with anyone else until she is stable. I flipped out. I hadn’t realized how desperately I needed this, or how invested I was. He assures me that it’s not “no”, just “not yet”, so we’ve continued, but last night I needed emotion, not just sex, and I just couldn’t do it anymore. I want to be able to say to someone that I love them AND that I want them, but if I can’t have that both in the same person, I need to know how to compartmentalize better. How do YOU do that?
AboughttersParticipantMost of what is in that link is more or less what I’d say myself.
With a few exceptions.
Hands and feet. Nuns never have a problem hitting the mark with a little stick. lol Bastinado is quite fun. When I have a guy on his knees and his feet are turned up, they’re fair game far as I’m concerned. You don’t have to worry about your aim in this position because it’s already on the floor. The surface of the floor will prevent wraparound. Likewise if the person is on a bed. Just be careful of the tendon behind the heel.
I mostly do a moderate swipe or two now and then, realizing they have jobs and have to stand and walk. lol But if someone wants a more harsh treatment, I’d be perfectly willing to give it to them. I have numerous implements that would suit, including canes, coaxial cable, paddles and several kinds of flogger.
Kidneys…this is going to depend on the person and their own tolerance and the implements used. Coaxial, yes, I’m definitely going to be very careful where I strike. But a regular ol’ flogger on a big boy or big girl isn’t so much a problem. If they have layers of fat around the middle, that’s going to insulate the kidneys, and gives a wider range to flog on without as much worry. I can employ more follow through and really drag the flogger down their back in the swing.
How small is too small? How big is big enough? Talk to the person while flogging and ask. People I play with know I expect them to answer me honestly. If they don’t, I’ll never play with them again.
Breasts and more care. Eh. I’m just finishing up healing from a breast paddling I took two weeks ago. If the bottom understands what they’ll have to deal with after, and for how long they’ll be dealing with it, how much more care is rather up to them. EW will flog my tits just as hard as he does my back. The “care” he takes is to not misfire and whack me on the neck and face. lol And I take care as well, and use my arms to cover and take any errant swings. No one is perfect. Taking tails to the ear is a hazard if one wishes to be a whipping post. lol
She doesn’t cover canes, but I have a lot to say on those too. lol
Using a pillow. Absolutely. But I go a bit farther in telling a novice flogger wielder to have someone lie on a sheet on the floor. Trace their shape in marker. Note the elbows, the knees, the ankles, mark the soft tissue below the ribs. Then drape the sheet over the bed with a couple pillows under it to approximate a shape. Drape it over the comfy chair to see how everything changes. Drape it over the back of the sofa (one of our favorite places) with the pillows.
Hope this is helpful.
ThoillodyParticipantI find flogging on the breasts so good; Although, at the moment, Sir’s a bit worried about the accidental missing, and landing on my face etc; Though he’s usually very damn accurate, Actually I find my breasts can take about as much with the flogger, if not more, than most other parts of the body, I.E., back and buttocks thighs etc, the main sort of areas I guess…
ThoillodyParticipantAs a sub, and, actually only recently having discovered floggers, I have to say they’re also my favorite form of impact/pain play, with Sir. Sir enjoys having control over me, being able to dominate, and have me submit, and release control to him; I’m more able to withstand ‘more’ from a flogger, so it lets me surrender more control, and submit more to him; Which tics boxes for both of us. Floggers are an entire sensual experience too; I love the smell (leather), the feel of it being gently trailed over my breasts, and skin, the little stingy short sharp ‘hits’, on my body, I adore multiple thuddy hits, on buttons, thighs,breasts, etc, and can I think probably be flogged, with the thuddy type, of hit, for longer than Sir would want to doso; but he’s in control of it, and as its so multiple in the affects a flogger cna induce, he can edge me towards subspace, with the thuddy ones, then ‘draw back’, with a few stingy hits, before returning to thuddy; or, of course, switching to a paddle, cane, etc. I adore the flogger too, used in warm up; being caressed with it, gradually building up severity of strikes, etc…
Youds1949ParticipantWell, flogging is one of my favorite things and I am on the swinging end, but I love it for the reactions it elicits ooohs/aahs and squeals not so much the workout. LOL However, I am not your typical dom I have a wide variety of swings and throwing styles and an even larger collection of floggers since I started making them years ago. 😉 I can and have had entire flogging scenes with Pet, I can and have flogged him for hour+ at a time.
Youds1949ParticipantHey,
I need a lady who can wield a whip to flog me so that I can roll the pipe away from me. If you can help, contact me.
Laugh Long, Love Life
Thich1979Participanthello, ebay is a great source for leather. Try shopping at Goodwill and other such places for leather coats or vinyl… Things you don’t mind cutting.
Glove leather is about 2 to 4 ounces and is soft. The softer the leather the lesser the thud. The heavy the leather the lesser sting. The wider the fall (the individual strips) the more thing, less sting, the more narrow the fall, the more sting.
It is up to you what you are wanting. I have seen floggers made from everything. Rope, old raincoats, old coats, just about anything…
Just made sure it is balanced and makes you and you playmate happy 🙂
Aken1963ParticipantUse the yellow pages. Call local upholstery shops. They keep the random edges and ends. $10 bucks worth can make a pretty decent flogger. I have even found 1/4 hides for $30. All kinds of cool colors.
RacclutParticipantWould love to have more descrete tools and restraints. Never know when family may stop by and not so easy to find a place to put tools and restrains away. Ultimately it would depend on the style of the furniture and price. My advise, post a picture of the prototype and asking price and go from there.
SaidinParticipantI’m eager to learn more, but conversation about this useful piece of furniture seems to have died. I have a (locked) dedicated room in my house, but I would like a convertible piece like this in the bedroom when play is best handled there.
TrabutParticipantnew to the site but this sounds like a worthy project id like to take on. Im mainly rope and furniture but do leather as well (Tandy leather is your friend all hardware is rated for horse tack very strong and great selection and the local are amiable to all kinds of questions) ive done several saint andrews crosses that flip over to be a table you uncrew legs and srew in the eyebolts etc etc
Ribut1974ParticipantI went to school for cabinetmaking and am currently doing random jobs out of my house. This idea of yours sounds very interesting i would love to hear more about it what ideas you have already developed and what still needs to be tweeked? It sounds like something that would be very fun to make.
GeolasParticipantFold away or discrete would be important to me, since I have a family. It depends on the quality and size for the price. If it’s something that does little and just folds up into a closet, maybe $200 tops. If it does more like you said and wasn’t made of shite material? You could probably slap a $1000 price tag on it, but I would probably just drool over it then not buy it because of the price.
GeolasParticipantYou can screw a thick eyebolt into the floor very close to the molding behind a piece of furniture. When you move, just unscrew it and give it a dollop of wood putty.
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